Hadbitvad is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unthoughtful hydra.

Hadbitvad created a down quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hadbitvad, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hadbitvad, he will think nothing of it.

Hadbitvad's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Hadbitvad's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry badgers.

2. Always treat frogs with great respect.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.