Hoggemdog is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, caring warg.

Hoggemdog created Africa four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hoggemdog, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hoggemdog, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hoggemdog's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Hoggemdog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never feed melons to tapirs while wearing shoes.

3. Erect a large copper sculpture of Hoggemdog on top of all buildings.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never wear pink coats.