Langardam is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, effective giraffe.

Langardam created parasitic wasps six million years ago.

If you believe in Langardam, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Langardam, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Langardam's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Langardam's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

3. Never think about solid mechanics near squirrels while wearing purple ear rings and balancing four nickel spheres on your head.

4. Never feed lots of figs to sharks while wearing violet stockings.

5. Never paint your face blue.