Linjapran Besszakgess is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, emotional wyvern.

Linjapran Besszakgess created a quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Linjapran Besszakgess, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Linjapran Besszakgess, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Linjapran Besszakgess' most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Linjapran Besszakgess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never talk about black holes.