Zaglatspag is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, staggering frog.

Zaglatspag created viruses eight million years ago.

If you believe in Zaglatspag, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zaglatspag, he will turn you into a tree.

Zaglatspag's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Zaglatspag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zaglatspag's name in vain.

2. Never feed corn to pigs while wearing coats.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Zaglatspag in the centre of the settlement.

4. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never talk about optics near frogs while wearing black shorts.