Cunbetgof is a god.

He takes the form of a large, temperamental duck.

Cunbetgof created an electron four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cunbetgof, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cunbetgof, he will turn you into a rat.

Cunbetgof's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Cunbetgof's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of grasshopers.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not trade with those who eat peas.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near mites while wearing fawn shirts and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your legs.

5. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.