Cetlargfas is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, witty armadillo.

Cetlargfas created the solar system two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetlargfas, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cetlargfas, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cetlargfas' most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Cetlargfas' Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured badgers.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

4. Cetlargfas loves dogs, so they must be respected.

5. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Cetlargfas in the centre of the settlement.