Vonkbifwik is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, weak shrew.

Vonkbifwik created parasitic wasps four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonkbifwik, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Vonkbifwik, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vonkbifwik's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Vonkbifwik's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear yellow.

2. You must never eat carrots.

3. Hide from cyan sheep for they are unholy.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never mention doves.