Lopcatgan is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, impressive coyote.

Lopcatgan created a quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopcatgan, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lopcatgan, she will manifest in front of you.

Lopcatgan's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Lopcatgan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Lopcatgan loves ants, so they must be respected.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Sheep are not to be trusted.