Yamfobcen is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, wise rhinoceros.

Yamfobcen created dark matter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yamfobcen, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Yamfobcen, she will turn you into a worm.

Yamfobcen's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Yamfobcen's Holy Commandments

1. Yamfobcen must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not wear silicon on your body.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always make sure there are no otters in a building before entering it.

5. Never pour water over plants.