Nullrowzen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish hippopotamus.

Nullrowzen created light two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nullrowzen, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nullrowzen, he will be mildly annoyed.

Nullrowzen's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Nullrowzen's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Nullrowzen in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never talk about solid mechanics near turtles while wearing black stockings and balancing five silicon spheres on your neck.