Tafyamquaffotbif is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, uncaring otter.

Tafyamquaffotbif created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tafyamquaffotbif, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tafyamquaffotbif, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Tafyamquaffotbif's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Tafyamquaffotbif's Holy Commandments

1. Porpoises are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

3. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Tafyamquaffotbif in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Do not eat oranges.