Cumgunnak is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, fussy butterfly.

Cumgunnak created a photon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumgunnak, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cumgunnak, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Cumgunnak's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Cumgunnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never wear fawn kilts.

5. Never talk about cell theory.