Gepqueegfum is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unthoughtful skunk.

Gepqueegfum created the cosmos nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepqueegfum, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gepqueegfum, she will refuse to believe in you.

Gepqueegfum's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gepqueegfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt nematodes.

2. Never think about dwarf planets.

3. Always help moths in need.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Gepqueegfum on top of all buildings.

5. Never eat green fruit.