Fashomsak is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, fast hydra.

Fashomsak created snails four years ago.

If you believe in Fashomsak, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fashomsak, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Fashomsak's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Fashomsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in the presence of geese.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never feed cucumbers to voles while wearing gray hats.

4. You must pray to Fashomsak eight times a day.

5. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.