Tipartgempakrot is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, competent cow.

Tipartgempakrot created oxygen seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tipartgempakrot, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tipartgempakrot, it will throw large rocks at you.

Tipartgempakrot's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Tipartgempakrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics near hamsters while wearing purple tights and balancing eight nickel spheres on your hands.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Run away from indigo cats, for they are unholy.

4. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

5. Do not shave your chest.