Teensadfum is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, unthinking grasshopper.

Teensadfum created a strange quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Teensadfum, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Teensadfum, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Teensadfum's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Teensadfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Teensadfum's name in vain.

2. Do not drink water in black rooms.

3. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Teensadfum in the centre of the settlement.

5. Retreat if four voles approach from the north.