Highanbell is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, unjust narwhal.

Highanbell created carbon five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Highanbell, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Highanbell, he will come to you in dreams.

Highanbell's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Highanbell's Holy Commandments

1. Always help moths in need.

2. Run away if nine squirrels approach from the south.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not stand on grass.