Kikbosslan is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, generous hedgehog.

Kikbosslan created an atom seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kikbosslan, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kikbosslan, it will turn you into a worm.

Kikbosslan's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Kikbosslan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Kikbosslan in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near moths while wearing yellow hats and balancing four nickel spheres on your hands.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.