Zakarm is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, dishonourable goose.

Zakarm created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakarm, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Zakarm, it will ignore you.

Zakarm's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Zakarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not take Zakarm's name in vain.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate monkeys.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never wear yellow tights.