Tinstipfud is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, narcissistic turtle.

Tinstipfud created a bottom quark two years ago.

If you believe in Tinstipfud, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tinstipfud, she will not care at all.

Tinstipfud's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Tinstipfud's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Tinstipfud's priests.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. You must love Tinstipfud.

4. Worship no other gods but Tinstipfud.

5. Never talk about asteroids.