Bedlistgum is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, omnipotent gerbil.

Bedlistgum created the Sun six million years ago.

If you believe in Bedlistgum, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bedlistgum, she will not care.

Bedlistgum's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Bedlistgum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat spinach.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. Never sprint in the presence of doves.

4. Hide if nine turtles approach from the east.

5. Never think about spacetime.