Panflighanbem is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, two-faced wren.

Panflighanbem created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Panflighanbem, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Panflighanbem, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Panflighanbem's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Panflighanbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nucleic acids.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Never bounce in the presence of manatees.

4. Never write about enzymes.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.