Aflarndob Hinmigrutt is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, emotional beaver.

Aflarndob Hinmigrutt created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Aflarndob Hinmigrutt, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Aflarndob Hinmigrutt, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Aflarndob Hinmigrutt's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Aflarndob Hinmigrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about figs.

2. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Aflarndob Hinmigrutt on top of all buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.

4. Do not take Aflarndob Hinmigrutt's name in vain.

5. Always look after injured bats.