Inggunlop Zaknellad is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, selfish finch.

Inggunlop Zaknellad created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Inggunlop Zaknellad, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Inggunlop Zaknellad, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Inggunlop Zaknellad's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Inggunlop Zaknellad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt monkeys.

2. Do not eat carrots.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never mention dogs.

5. Never talk about capybaras.