Tafcadwik is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, tiresome wren.

Tafcadwik created the Andromeda Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tafcadwik, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tafcadwik, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tafcadwik's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Tafcadwik's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Tafcadwik in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never talk about quantum field theory.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Run away if eight snails approach from the south.