Tadtompog is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, conceited beaver.

Tadtompog created the solar system four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadtompog, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tadtompog, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Tadtompog's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Tadtompog's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. You must pray to Tadtompog four times a day.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Do not keep six ants in a large pit.

5. Never feed lots of pineapples to voles while wearing turquoise shirts.