Satyampan Mabzodflam is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unselfish lobster.

Satyampan Mabzodflam created the Milkyway five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Satyampan Mabzodflam, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Satyampan Mabzodflam, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Satyampan Mabzodflam's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Satyampan Mabzodflam's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Satyampan Mabzodflam.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Run away from white ducks, for they are unholy.

4. Never think about chlorophyll.

5. Do not keep nine whales in a large pit.