Homgepjap is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, duplicitous penguin.

Homgepjap created Mount Everest three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Homgepjap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Homgepjap, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Homgepjap's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Homgepjap's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.