Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, passionate toad.

Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok created a top quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok, she will turn you into a slug.

Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Worship no other gods but Funflagcudlargdogjapvinyok.

5. Do not dye your hair violet.