Popfaghas is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, unselfish clam.

Popfaghas created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Popfaghas, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Popfaghas, she will turn you into a duck.

Popfaghas' most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Popfaghas' Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. You must pray to Popfaghas four times a day.

3. Do not hurt doves.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Popfaghas on top of all buildings.

5. Never talk about aardvarks.