Larpfethig is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unthinking pigeon.

Larpfethig created a strange quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larpfethig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Larpfethig, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Larpfethig's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Larpfethig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not take Larpfethig's name in vain.