Lamzimkad is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, pitiless slug.

Lamzimkad created the Sun three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamzimkad, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Lamzimkad, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Lamzimkad's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Lamzimkad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Erect six platinum sculptures of Lamzimkad on top of important buildings.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never pour water over plants.