Bafgubjap is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, unselfish cobra.

Bafgubjap created a quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafgubjap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bafgubjap, she will turn you into a snail.

Bafgubjap's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Bafgubjap's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Feed all hungry rats.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Never write about moons.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics.