Jangessmit is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, two-faced bee.

Jangessmit created a bottom quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jangessmit, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Jangessmit, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Jangessmit's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Jangessmit's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never feed cucumbers to nematodes while wearing dresses.

3. Never feed lots of garlic to swans while wearing white ear rings.

4. Do not take Jangessmit's name in vain.

5. Always help sick turtles.