Vannatwig is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, effective otter.

Vannatwig created matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vannatwig, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vannatwig, he will cry a lot.

Vannatwig's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Vannatwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four capybaras in a large pit.

2. Run away if nine birds approach from the south.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about eukaryotes.

5. Run away from gray grasshopers, for they are unholy.