Nankipbadsterkom is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, fast dog.

Nankipbadsterkom created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nankipbadsterkom, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nankipbadsterkom, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nankipbadsterkom's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Nankipbadsterkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

2. Never think about quantum field theory.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

4. Do not keep eight rats in a large pit.

5. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Nankipbadsterkom in the centre of the settlement.