Largzenmanquillnabarm is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, all-knowing armadillo.

Largzenmanquillnabarm created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Largzenmanquillnabarm, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Largzenmanquillnabarm, it will send minions to preach to you.

Largzenmanquillnabarm's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Largzenmanquillnabarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in the presence of bats.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always look after injured eagles.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.