Yathinjig is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, all-powerful fly.

Yathinjig created Europe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yathinjig, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Yathinjig, it will send you a sign.

Yathinjig's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Yathinjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of pineapples to manatees while wearing purple shirts.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Yathinjig.

3. Never go into blue rooms.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yathinjig.

5. Always take life seriously.