Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun is a god.

She takes the form of a large, omnipotent naga.

Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun created an up quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun's Holy Commandments

1. Gumgatpangbopdobbissgun must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always help sick pigs.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not hurt dogs.