Hanbepfig is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, cheerful cow.

Hanbepfig created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hanbepfig, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hanbepfig, she will destroy your home solar system.

Hanbepfig's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Hanbepfig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Never mention porpoises.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Fast once a month.