Bimbopdog is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, self-assured octopus.

Bimbopdog created Mount Everest nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimbopdog, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bimbopdog, she will turn you into a worm.

Bimbopdog's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Bimbopdog's Holy Commandments

1. Always help grasshopers in need.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Bimbopdog.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never think about cell theory.