Gunlatnutrat is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, selfish faun.

Gunlatnutrat created the Large Magellanic Cloud two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gunlatnutrat, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gunlatnutrat, he will turn you into a mouse.

Gunlatnutrat's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gunlatnutrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to gulls while wearing mauve shoes.

2. Do not hurt moths.

3. Do not chant in public.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.