Bifsadxemlenfed is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, witless newt.

Bifsadxemlenfed created energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bifsadxemlenfed, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bifsadxemlenfed, it will destroy your home solar system.

Bifsadxemlenfed's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Bifsadxemlenfed's Holy Commandments

1. Put Bifsadxemlenfed first in all things.

2. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

3. Never wear shirts.

4. Run away from yellow porpoises, for they are unholy.

5. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.