Flanortflam is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, astonishing zebra.

Flanortflam created the planet Saturn two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flanortflam, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Flanortflam, she will curse you with boils.

Flanortflam's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Flanortflam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chant in public.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not take Flanortflam's name in vain.

4. Flanortflam must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think about comets.