Kamkaddav is a god.

She takes the form of a large, grumpy raccoon.

Kamkaddav created carbon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kamkaddav, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Kamkaddav, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Kamkaddav's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Kamkaddav's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear green.

2. Do not skip in public.

3. Hide from blue snakes for they are unholy.

4. You must love Kamkaddav.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.