Zednattar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, capable lobster.

Zednattar created carbon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zednattar, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Zednattar, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Zednattar's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Zednattar's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum gravity near gulls while wearing turquoise skirts.

2. Never bounce in the presence of voles.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Put Zednattar first in all things.