Nansighap is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, witless faun.

Nansighap created a Higgs boson three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nansighap, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Nansighap, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nansighap's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Nansighap's Holy Commandments

1. Badgers are not to be trusted.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Nansighap.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.