Sagvabparkhatniggamont is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unfair swan.

Sagvabparkhatniggamont created a photon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagvabparkhatniggamont, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Sagvabparkhatniggamont, it will turn you into a hamster.

Sagvabparkhatniggamont's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Sagvabparkhatniggamont's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four birds in a large pit.

2. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Sagvabparkhatniggamont on top of all buildings.

3. Never mention mice.

4. Otters are not to be trusted.

5. Never chant in the presence of badgers.