Arfvadgab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, happy fox.

Arfvadgab created an up quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfvadgab, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Arfvadgab, she will think nothing of it.

Arfvadgab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Arfvadgab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair gray.

2. Never think about dark energy near aardvarks while wearing orange tights and balancing nine carbon spheres on your neck.

3. Run away from mauve tapirs, for they are unholy.

4. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

5. You must pray to Arfvadgab four times a day.